What Failing 3 Times Taught Me About Starting a Business

Spend a few minutes on social media and you’ll see a plethora of “success” posts. It goes on and on and on…and on. There is no end to it.

But what about the 99%? We rarely hear from them, UNLESS…

…you guessed it. People won’t talk about their failure unless they managed to become successful. Isn’t that a shame? 

That’s what I am going to talk about in this article…

Why? Because talking about success is the easy part — plus there’s enough people on social media telling their sweet stories already.

In this article, I will talk about what hurt…

…I invite you — my fellow entrepreneurs, business owners, startup founders, and anyone else who’s willing to continue reading…

…on a journey with me.

I will share my deepest and darkest days of attempt at entrepreneurship before I finally founded FMDM.

“But Derek, that’s so negative of you…” Not at all! Don’t confuse motivation with negativity. 

The reason I am sharing this is so you will realize…when you need it most, that you’re not alone as you navigate through your own raging rapids of entrepreneurship.

Negative individuals succumb to their failures. Motivated individuals rise up when they fail. 

A tough pill to swallow…

It took me many months to admit that I was at a total loss in building a business, much less growing a company.

I’ve been an internet marketer for over 18 years — so I’m comfortable with marketing strategy and tactics. But that meant absolutely nothing when it came to building a company.

Many marketers make the mistake of thinking they’re good at starting a business and building a company. That’s a myth.

You can be the best digital marketer — but it doesn’t mean you have a business acumen. It’s takes more than knowing how to run a PPC campaign or do keyword research to run a company.

But sadly for many, ego gets in the way — more often than not — and things fall apart. Just like what happened to me the first few times I tried starting my internet marketing consultancy business.

In this article, I will talk about how I failed three times…

…but first, with FMDM, I felt ready to be a business owner (again), marketer, and founder. Boy oh boy, was I disillusioned! 

Just 6 months into launching the ad agency, I was making mistakes with hiring, planning, management, resources, and prospecting. 

To my entrepreneur readers, you don’t need me to tell you how challenging starting a business is.

You already know, hell — you’re probably going through it right now. Thinking if you made the right decision to quit your regular job and take the leap. Trust me, it was, and is the right decision 🙂

And you definitely don’t need to hear about the struggles of keeping the dream alive…as I’m sure you are all working hard to do every single day to figure it out.

Let me be clear about this right now…

Nobody will understand your struggles. And nobody is going to care about your success…they’re just merely curious about how you got there.

Erase your expectation that you will find people who will invest their time (much less money) in your business. Does this happen? Sure. But it’s not as common as social media would have you think. 

Guard yourself against the fake authenticity disease. It’s a plague.

It’s not all doom and gloom

I’m not trying to discourage you– but starting a business is filled with a lot of downs and a handful of ups…and that’s they truth.

If we can’t talk about this openly — then we shouldn’t be preaching transparency. Yes, it’s not the sexist thing to talk about…but most truths never make it to the headlines…do they?

Having said that, as you invest energy, time, and money into your business, you better buckle up and get ready for turbulence — because it’s guaranteed. 

On that note, let me share my experiences with you…

1, 2, 3 times

My first business was an internet marketing consultancy — I had a handful of clients I was generating leads for and managing their Pay-Per-Click accounts. It was a side hustle.

The second was an attempt to run a SEO agency. While I had a handful of clients, it was short-lived. 

My third before launching PPC Advertising Agency, FMDM was another side hustle / consultancy that provided me with extra income. But that too didn’t work out and that chapter ended really fast.

The eventual demise of each of my past businesses has more details for another day. 

Here’s what they had in common — I failed because I was not accountable in many areas of my business and had too much pride to ask for help.

Lessons from my failed businesses

Nobody starts a business hoping to fail – duh!

But it’s a risk, nonetheless. Whether you are investing your savings, getting millions in venture capital, or have angel investors — starting ANY new business is risky.

Learning How To Cope With Failure 

You end up losing so much — not just the money but also your self-esteem, confidence, friendships, motivation, and even desire to just wake up in the morning.

I was in total denial when my first business shut down. My ego was so damn huge that I continued pretending not to realize it was doomed. 

I was pretending not knowing what I already knew. And that continued to spiral. The more I rejected the truth of the situation, the more I punished people around me and myself.

My friends, do not put yourself through this self-inflicted abuse. If your business is heading down the wrong path, you must come to terms with yourself…embrace the failure, accept it, and move on.

Nobody said you cannot fail. Right? Oh wait! Our damn culture ridicules failure — I’m not worth a lick if I fail. What kind of poppycock is that!?!?

Whoever told you that failure is unacceptable should go pound sand — really! 

They are the ones with issues, not you. 

Reality is, you MUST learn how to cope with failure. Why? Because you will fail. 

“Damn it, this (failure) was so unexpected,” is something I hear from entrepreneurs frequently. They actually believe that success is guaranteed and failing is utterly unbelievable. 

Wake up f*** up! Learn to cope. Period. You’ll take more positive with you the next time you launch your next business.

Taking a Break and Doing It Again

Call yourself whatever you want — a serial entrepreneur, a hustler, work horse, etc — doesn’t make a difference what the moniker is.

At the end of the day, your character is on trial. 

When I came out of my first failed business, I dove right into the next — thinking that I’ve learned from my mistakes and I will do so much better in the next one.

When I reflect on my early years, I wished I took a break and focused on learning — going to work for agencies — and honing my skills in all aspects of business management. 

After my first failed business, the second and third were my “rebound” attempts…and we know how rebounds typically end up. 

It’s OK to take a break after one failed attempt and take the time to regroup. 

It’s about what you do after the lesson

Life is a great teacher, but you must be an A-student as well to get anything out of it. 

I’m talking about taking action here! 

Those coaching seminars and leadership seminars you attend will tell you the same thing — the only difference, it’s coming from someone on a platform. 

Every one experiences failure in one form or another. Sure, you’ll get over it with time. And you may even learn to mentally file it away, but that won’t change the fact that you failed.

It is what action you take after learning your lesson. You could pay thousands of dollars to hire the best golf coach, but if you’re not practicing beyond your lessons, you’re still going to suck at golf.

So many people go to these leadership training; get pumped up over 3 or 4 days of adrenaline-pumping sessions. A week later, they find themselves back to “normal” — because they have not taken any action after their pumped-up lesson! 

It’s that simple my friends. Life teaches us every day. You must choose to put in the effort to become better. It doesn’t happen through osmosis! 

Failure is a Gift

Life is a great teacher, but the failure you experience is a great gift. “What on earth are you talking about Derek? Are you high???” Although…

…cannabis industry is booming so much that even Gary Vee bullish on it…but I digress.

Failure is frowned upon by society…because we are raised to believe that only success is celebrated and failing is shameful. 

To hell with that ancient and destructive mindset. 

Embrace your failure, but do not dwell in it. Here are 5 reasons why I believe failure is such an underrated gift:

1. it reminds us that we’re human with limited abilities and have infinite opportunities to learn and to grow
2. it serves as a wake up call to help us change course and pivot the business (after you put your ego aside)
3. failure exposes our weakness; so you may learn to focus on your strength instead
4. it humbles us and, if we choose to embrace it, elevate our character
5. it protects us from our own pride from going too far to a point of no return

My friends, from my first hand experience, let me say that my failures were the best thing that happened to me…when I decided to embrace and learn from it…the move on.

Summing It Up

Nobody likes to fail. And especially no one likes to be associated with a failure. But what if, your failure is only the beginning of your success? Would you look at it through a different set of lens?

Let me know your thoughts on this.