Transcript: Lockdown with Thought Leader Jay Andrews
So I have the pleasure speaking with Jay Andrews today, and I’ve been getting to know him just a little bit.
I’m learning that he is, a real survivor and one of the most positive of lifting conversations I’ve had in a while, so I’m really excited to get to speak with you and go more in depth about what you do and what you have to share with people.
Can you just introduce yourself, tell us a little bit about who you are and what you do.
The man, the leader: Jay Andrews
Sure I’m living in our capital city of Ottawa, Canada here, and I’m basically in a nut, a motivational speaker, talking about adversity resilience and a leadership coach and help people build those leadership skills and everybody things that has to be in a business, but he also need leadership, skills in everyday life, and that’s feeling with people spouses, children, Friends and family is not only slotted into the workplace.
We also have to show up as leaders, people use that as a leader, as a parent, but you also have to come up, as a leader, a spouse as a friend. So leadership has many hats. And so people, I try to teach people you don’t get pigeon-holed into just using it in the workforce, using in every day life.
So what is it like in Canada right now? I can speak from what we’re seeing here, just in California. Do you know if there’s anything different today? And how we’re responding to this pandemic in Canada versus the US?
I think what the big difference is, is I don’t wanna get into politics here.
I think the big difference is is that we truly our government…
How is happening here is, they were really truly relying on the science and figured out what they were really basing everything on science and where there a few mistakes made, yes, governments are gonna make mistakes.
Canadian people, we are perfectly imperfect and if people can truly understand that, then we don’t bend it a shape when people screw up now they continuously screwing up.
There might be a problem here because the key is that we make a mistake, hopefully we learn from it, and we don’t remake the mistake again, have…
But here in Canada, obviously, the population is not as dense, within our roles and sisters to this, and so the each province as high numbers Ontario is quite high and VCs pretty bad Quebec as bad as well, but I think it has to do with where we’re located, our tickle on the map, I and cover so close to Seattle, and there’s a bad area that’s going on down there and then we’re so close to New York and there, all the issues that’s happening there.
So I just think we’re in trusting is going on.
The true heroes out there are all our paramedics and police officers first responders, doctors people are in the grocery stores, those are the men and women, they’re putting their lives on the line every day.
So then, you and I could have this conversation, so to speak.
Yeah, exactly and I think it’s really unifying to her and realize that we’re kind of…
Well not kind of really, really in the same boat, we’re all stuck in our houses, no matter where you’re from, so that’s nice to have that reality.
No matter where you’re at right now, it’s unifying all over and people think they’re… “Oh no, I’m stuck in the house and all of these things that come with that, but I teach coach and speak with people all the time My venting that I… People monitor is flip the script, so whatever…
Whatever it is that you see in front of you, you have the ability in the mindset within soul self, to flip it, it is a choice and you could choose to say, This is the way it’s gonna be and if it goes down a negative road, and that’s the role that the choice is being made or you can choose to flip it and try to make the best of the situation.
If I was your audience for motivating and I was trying to put my thought process from a negative which I am seeing a lot on social media.
Some people are just like, “I can’t handle it, to in… I’m so depressed. I saw a girl say recently, “I don’t see anything worth living right now, it’s just too hard, I can’t handle it. I think she lost her job for somebody like that or the people that are saying those things are filling those things, what would be the one thing you could say that they could do to flip it? What’s the actionable set that someone could take to look that mindset? Look, that mindset?
Yeah, I think the first thing, the most important thing is really think about what is the one thing and everyone has this. I don’t care who you are on this planet, I don’t care where you are in this world. ’cause we’re all faced with this is that everyone has this one look or this passion, this fire that’s inside of them that there is one thing, whatever that one thing is.
Now, maybe that’s outside of the home, maybe you’re fortunate if it’s inside of them, but the key is you need to write it down. Because once you write it down, and then once you read it down, say out loud, and if people are with you and you see this one word out loud, and they look at you funding, it’s not for them. This is for you.
There is something to be said about having something that’s inside your soul that you feel and you write it down and then actually see it allowed to. Your other senses can hear it.
So you’re… You’re actually hearing the words, that’s the first step in knowing that there is hope that there is something that’s gonna get through at the end of the finish line. I know the analogy is, we have doctors and I see it on CNN and NBC in the United States and CS and here in Canada is all our CTV and call the radio use news affiliates, and they’re saying it’s not just a sprint, it’s a marathon and there is actually truth to this, right?
And I think this is the whole point of writing down that thing that you are just unbelievable, passionate about and you just… One thing you love, that makes you…
You or just makes you most unique and incredible person had ever that you all and that everyone else is, and that’s the thing you hold on to. And then once you have that, then you can start thinking about what are all the things that you never had time for, right, yeah, I no, because people, for the longest time, or this bad or honor of, “I’m busy, I’m so busy, you know what I do, I work, I like 12 hours and I’ve got two kids and I’ve got this and… And I have that in the dog.
I played sports and I’m part of the PTA, or I’m part yes, okay, you’re busy. And then, people wore that with a badge of honor, but now that badge has been ripped off the sleeve, and now people have time, and if you ask somebody six weeks ago before all this going was on, what were the one thing somebody would have probably said in the top five, they probably would have asked for time and was a… Had more time and now the… Here you go, and here we are.
And so what better way to now take advantage of this time? So for myself, who’s a parent of four teen age boys, it’s like Well it’s not just me, I just got it. A very cool right now is a host. I am very fortunate I live in a very decent-sized home. So you can’t separate but even separation that I still feel small.
But that being said, it’s… I have to give full credit to my wife, she’s like, I always say she gets five stop every day she’s just amazing. But it’s a collective between the two, a lot two of us. But with her being so busy normally, and myself as well, we at the time now to actually be present with all kids and having teenagers, so that could be awkward sometimes ’cause they don’t necessarily wanna be conversing all the time, and I can respect that, but I’m sure people at home can relate to this, when you’re in the office space, sometimes you’re not talking to people, but you’re actually in the same room.
And so there’s that energy that I… That kind of makes you feel Okay, I feel part of something and I think it’s super important to any parents out there. I have children or whether with a spouse or whatever the situation, if you sharing your personal space with another individual, is not a necessity to speak all the time, but being in the same room that energy, that silent energy can actually speak volumes and can help fill your bucket, even if it’s just a little bit…
One drop adds so much more. That wasn’t there before or… So I we’re finding now, being with our kids is great and that’s awesome. Yeah, it’s just you. And for the woman that you were speaking about earlier about… Like she lost your job, you know what whatever the term you’re using, you could say.
Everyone says God has a purpose for everyone, or the universe speaks to us in certain ways. I’m not saying that a job is not important ’cause it sure is because you need to put money and food on a roof over your head like that. This could be your opportunity to say, “You know what, I’m gonna find something better after this.
I’m gonna start now to better myself. So when things get back to somewhat back to normal, I’m gonna be a better person and I’m gonna get a better job or I’ll be in a better living situation, or I have a set idea or a clear vision of what I wanna be doing, which will maybe I’ll travel more or so my friends more or go and visit that one place I said I was gonna do, but now after what I just been through, I’m definitely gonna go do it.
Yeah, definitely. It’s an area of opportunity for all of us.
Yeah, I totally agree. So when you’re saying in the room, and how you get that in the office, I actually made me think we’ve been actually praising, being working from home lately during all of this, we’ve been trying to find the positive in that you make a really good point.
There are positives in the office, and there’s positive to being remote. So, with that point that you’re making, do you feel that there’s another way to get that vibe or connection with your team remotely?
Absolutely, so I’m just gonna throw a few ideas out here because I actually had this conversation with some people and then they actually go back to me, like Holly crag. It was the best thing, and so, there was so many things out there now, when life was normal, really a… Yeah, we had so many apps on our phone and there are so many things that were going on in this world that would connect us in certain type of way through social media.
Well now, one is just a lot of noise which I was back then but there are some really good things up there and why not set up a… Why called it, the group jam? So if you are working with a bunch of people you set up a Zoom call or a group meeting and what you can do is that everybody puts together a play-list and you resubmit is their play list. And so what’s gonna happen is that when you’re in the office, working everybody has an opportunity and you can do two things. One person gets to play there for a five-track playlist is, depending on how many people you can make the play list longer a shorter or each individual gets to play one track.
And I see like people send me some video, and like you see somebody working at the computer and then you can see the screen and then you can tell that they’re into, I guess, pop music or whatever, I… And as out of country song came on, and they’re giggling and they try to keep their trying to focus and in a marking a right, and you can just tell that it’s not their gym and it’s the thing and it’s just…
Music has a way of bonding everyone together, and again, music shows are uniqueness and our specialty who we are as individuals. And it lightens up something that you need to get through the day, but it shows us that we’re connecting as well. And I threw that at some people when they got back to me and they said, it was one of the best things they did.
That’s a really good idea. I like that when you’re at home working by yourself, so say you’re by yourself and you’re working at home. Oh my gosh, think about this. If you have to go on camera, yes you have to wear maybe a nice shirt but you… We were in our area, the bottoms.
No ones gonna see you from below. You don’t really mean I have some phone with this. Think about all the coffee you can be able to drink in the course of the day, and he said, “You wanna go out and step over some pressure, you open your front door.
It’s there, if you’re in an AP and you go into your balcony you can play whatever music you want you don’t have someone say, turn it down, you’re not having some one day, please don’t play that. There’s the Patty to make the environment you are in the best environment, that you think thrive in.
That was a really great idea. I think maybe we’ll bring that up with our team. I like that as far as having the teenagers in the house. So I have a seven-year-old and I realized how much more food that I’m going through. I’m just curious, so are you having trouble just loading the fridge and it emptying as best as your load had?
Yes, food has ten the cost of food has gone up a bit. One of the things I’ve done, now I do all the cooking in my home and so that’s one of my passions and loves is put on some Frank Sinatra, a good glass of red wine, and I’m in my element, and I know in a bed in the kitchen, but what I’m trying to do is meal plan but at the same time, while a meal planning, I’m trying to get the boys and go now.
Am I asking him to make some mama? No, but I can say them. What meals do you actually like eating? And so, one of the boys loves butter chicken. I’m like, “Oh okay, easy. So what I’ll do is that I’ll prep the chicken stuff, this and then I’m like, all just the ingredients, and we’re in the kitchen. So not only are you bonding with your children, and now they’re taking ownership of actually a meal instead of just being the person sits on the table and inhale there.
Actually, there’s more an appreciation ’cause they had a hand in it and I think one of the best things we can do with our children regardless of the age 70-53, 13-18, whatever it is, have them be part of the everyday function now I, the older ones, they should have more of a commanding role. What goes on in the home?
But I think it’s important regardless of the little ones they… It should become like a fun activity or there should be in it and if I have found not if you have them participating, who consumption may drop of it? It’s not like they’re constantly opening the poverty, just how many people are bad, when they see their child open the fridge and they just… Stand there. No, what you do, looking for something to eat, and or the cover, right?
And I think if we have them participate in even… What type of snacks do you want? Instead of crackers and cheese, on outfit, what about some urges? Or apples may be to treat his apples and pan butter? I don’t know, but it’s just like you try to figure it out.
Or what we’ve got is, one of my boys, he’s not a big Apple guy but anything having pentameter with it is just like, I… He got a chocolate bar or something, right? It’s that kind of a treat, and that… But you get his participation and it’s like What would make have free better?
And he’s a pain. I’m like, “Alright let’s do it. So it’s like you as a parent when they win because they think they’re getting what they want. And it is more of a compromise and then they’re seeing effort to watch the Apple cut it up in slices. I get the pin, put it in a dish.
We’ve seen all the process of it and they appreciate it, more. I mean, this is what I’m not a doctor, I don’t have a PhD, but I do mean a parent and seeing other people, parents, other children.
I have seen that when you involve young people, children, they tend to appreciate what they have and really I think just if we get it all to participate a bit more and give them more of a say or feel it they’re contributing more than it gives a better vibe or a better thing going on.
And I mean, let’s face it, our kids are gonna be adults one day, so… So my dad in one… Yeah, not too soon but yeah, I get my Sunday at vegetables by letting them pick out which ones… And so any you want? And I’ll make something out of it.
So money-saving tips on groceries, have your kids cook.
Yeah, it really does work because you know what I mean? Let’s be some of our kids, let’s majority of our children, regardless of the age.
They don’t understand how much food costs, right? And so if they say, “We want whatever type of thing, that goes with a meal, and we know that’s a ground beef is or take the is expensive, right, like a tea on stage is not cheap and right yet, right is expensive and that’s what they love.
You can explain to them saying This one t-bone state cost say 27, that 27 would by a solid carrots, potatoes, in a… Yeah, all that money would buy all that food and all that food would give us three or four meals, right, or you can get this one thing and give you one new.
Yeah, and I think that’s how we did it with our teenage boys, ’cause now they’re kinda understanding. I get it. Okay, so you’re trying to stretch the money ’cause let’s base it.
We’re all under a lot of financial strain most of us, whether we doesn’t matter where you are in this world, a lot of us are feeling that financial strains so we’re trying to maximize the dollar as far as it can go.
And I think if you do have children in the house, it’s not covering the rise and no land to know what’s going on, but it’s giving them a little bit of insight on kind of the dynamics of how food works…
Yeah, most definitely. And I think you say, “We’re all financially things are just changing and even if I know people who are doing really well right now, I think even they are extremely aware that we don’t know how many months this is going on, we don’t know how it’s gonna affect more companies we don’t know. We didn’t know that the gyms were all gonna close. And then the… Would you be working your has? Yeah, that’s… That’s happening.
So I noticed that you are just really great. Anything I throw you can just turn it into something positive. I’m like, Okay, so I feel like I could tell you the house breakdown and you got something good to say, about it and I don’t know, I mean, that’d be tough and tiring right?
And so I just want to you to share where you got that gift, of being able to stay so positive and you share about resilience and that is something that is so so important right now we are… And resilience. So you can tell me your background there.
Jay Andrews: Resilience is key
Yeah, I would love to say I was born with this and maybe I was… I think I’ve always did an optimist, but I think the light… So peak, came on over 10 years ago, so there was three major things. We not… We all… But sometimes, major life events happen to us and then we wake up or we continue to sleep walk.
I’m not saying one is worse or right than the other or for myself, I… Three things happened to me and then they all happened within a span of just over a year shy of just year two months or something like that. I first thing was, I was diagnosed with a blood disorder.
That there is no cure for. And that was very hard to hear when I was in my 30s because I was healthy, I was in shape, had the corporate job and had… What I thought was a lot of friends and the white picket fence and this sort of life right and that was a bit of a reality check and punch in the stomach to find out that I won’t see past…
I took a long time to come to terms with…but as I was saying to you earlier, that knowing your export he’s been a blessing. I don’t freak out about the small stuff anymore.
Really put your life in perspective, and you don’t take anything for granted and getting up every day it’s like, Wow, enough with inside day. But if I learned from the bad day if I really truly understood from that bad day, then you know what it… Then I get to do it again and not make that mistake or or learn from what what that… What that was.
And it’s a blessing you get up and be the breathing on this planet every single day. Because we have so much to offer and so much to get to so many people, we give to people and we don’t even know we’re doing it, it and… ’cause in the reason why we don’t know because people don’t share what a gift we are to them, they don’t tell us.
And maybe considering what we’re going through right now, more people will say Thank you, You changed my life. You’ll help me maybe we’ll start hearing that bit more to follow back. So I go through this doctors a pit and he have this disorder, that I have.
And shortly afterwards, I was involved in a pretty core of the car accident that Should have claimed my life. It’s no medical reason why I’m alive and I had to spend better half of ’11 at months retraining my body to be strong getting to work.
They told me I never run, which I proved them wrong and I was able to do that, and while I was at the tail end of my rehab, I was diagnosed with cancer, and it was… And then we… I’m here with you and I beat cancer, so.. It’s like a boxing ring in right? Like you’re in the ring with imagine being it, everyone read now everyone, it’s going through the crap that we’re all going through now.
Loss of your job, trying to figure out where money is gonna come from, you know, all these things, you’re in the ring with life and say You’re like Muhammad Ali and you’re dancing around for all those people.
Remember who he was and is taking swings at you and you move out of the way and you’re like, why that was close but you stick in there and then you get punched and but you don’t go down, but you feel it and you’re like That hurt.
But I’m okay, I can back I lost my breath, but I’m back in there and I’m going and then you get hit again but this time you hit them at and you have three options, you can lay there on the mat and just ask to be candid out, right?
Your second option is you can turn to your corner and your coach, and the people that support you and then they’re in your core time, they can throw on a towel and help you out and get you out of what you’re going through and not type of support as the third thing is, you get up off your feet did yourself up off the mat, local life in the face and say, “Is that the best you got?
So the best shot, you’ve got I can take it and now I’m gonna give it back. And for me, I try to… I’m not saying whatever decision you make when you’re laying on the ground that it really truly is up to an individual because we all make our decisions but I believe in the human spirit that we have it within us, even when it’s a belief is some moments local and I have gone through and there were dog days there were dark times, that I wanted to pack it in and say, “Are you kidding me? Cancer now? And you want me to get through this? But I just, I refused to let that be me.
And maybe one day, something out there will eventually do that, but not on my watch. Not on my time, right and… And I believe that we all have it within us, that what’s happening, the crisis in this global dynamic thing that we’re all going through right now, with the corona virus that is touched everyone is that we are truly seeing I know we are in these horror stories about some of the core bad things that are going on that vein, and that’s normal. We’re always gonna hear about the bad stuff because you know I…
There was an old expression that, my fall used to say to me that he learns from in the media and the person said to them that ran this major newspaper.
I said If I lead it leads… And so, to that if it was bad news is gonna be on the top of the top of the thing to talk about, but people need to understand is that there’s so much good happening in this world right now, it’s unbelievable, to unity is being pushed.
I pushed or being shot. We’re not tipping over the cliff we’re actually getting strong. You’re seeing so many wonderful things out that… And these are the things that make me know that we all have it within us, to get through what we’re going through at this moment.
Making Positivity Contagious
Yeah, no, I think that’s great, and I think it’s great that we are all in this together. So I think it would be great if people have gone this far, watching the video. I would be really interested if they would be willing to tag somebody that has been that… Like for them and has been that encouragement, because I think you’re right, sometimes people just don’t know.
There are people in my life that have helped me and there are times when I’ve made a point to reach out in the years later. I say You really hope me through that moment years ago. I don’t think you realize that just that hug or that telling me I can do it or whatever.
Actually, we so much further than what you never knew. And so I think that it’s really nice to hear that and have that. So I’m hoping that some people watching this could be willing to say something and take that person and just I think is brilliant.
I think that’s a wonderful idea. Yes, and you know what if you have the time, which we all do is You know what, right? A letter. And if you are able to figure out where they all actually mail them a letter and they get actually open up and lead it, or send them a message, email, something like that.
I know I personally have reached out to people. See, this is nothing is that… Now what is it? This is beautiful because remember we were talking about earlier, I have this mantra, right? Life is like And I potential and someone’s talking to you a little one like… And this is perfect, this is the new world, it’s a great…
Yeah, I been working with it. ’cause the kids are or board they’re not seeing their friends or they’re like play with me, hang out with me. So yeah, we hear Him more right now.
These things that can be done in the house, what we did with our kids and he’d been older, but we did two red cups, and we have golf clubs down says and then we just took bond and the attorney with putting on the car on this long stretch we’ve done…
We took a garbage can out of the bathroom, put it up, go high somewhere in the kitchen, took the socks and every was having a free throw, and they were like…
If where we get the most basket doesn’t have to clean the bathroom and that’s what it every body’s in right, who wants to scrub the shower I don’t… And so everyone’s in it and you’re just having fun.
And the thing is, is like you’re, literally, I don’t know, they do paper airplanes and they’ve done chuck them in the basement and what have you in a… I like the the little competition in a the replay fortresses that’s great, there you go, right?
But I didn’t wanna distract from… You said that you have the mantra. And I think I got a little bit side track to a…
No, I loved it because it is it really truly is, this is that life is life, and we are all experiencing that right now. And instead of getting up frustrated or upset.
So let’s embrace it because when you in before, it’s like if you were busy on a call, and your child interrupts you, your first instinct is like Kid you not see it or right now, more than that I… Now we’re in a situation is, is that why are we getting upset? It’s like if you were on a business call right now. I’m sure I’d be like… You gotta let a one, it’s okay.
And then you say hi to him or her and you just kinda going because no little interaction, whether it’s 30 seconds or three minutes, it’ll be over, and whatever we were discussing, we’ll just pick up we’ll we left off.
And that’s the whole thing about us as human beings, whether you’re in the United States, Canada, in Europe, he will pick up and move forward. will be exactly the same as life as it was before this happened. Probably not, but it’ll be close. And we have the capabilities of making this world better, ’cause we’re learning from what has happen right now, and this is huge, is the lot of good. It’s gonna come out of this.
Think about, there’s gonna be a baby boom that’s gonna come out of this. And there are all these smart smart many women out there out of what age they are, they have the opportunity now to stay home and come up with these brilliant ideas, write them down, put them in the computer do what they need to do, and then all of a sudden those ideas would never show up ’cause they were working and they never had the time to write and have this and there’s so much good is gonna come out of…
At the world is gonna change in such a positive way. It’s gonna be a… I definitely believe that we’re gonna have a creativity boom. There’s gonna be more music and books and this art that’s gonna come out, and I think that that’s gonna be huge, especially when we’re all the doors open and we can tell you test your guys that… And I definitely think that that will be something that happens.
Do you think that this empathy that has been created in the world will soon be forgotten or do you think it will carry over?
That for someone like me, it’s like I see the best in humanity and I truly believe that it will continue, but I’m a strong, strong believer also is we make choices and you have to make the choice to choose to continue to show that empathy.
If we don’t, if we go back to our old ways we’re gonna get into in the kick in the pants until we wake up and I, this to me, we should all be looking at this is a wake-up call and let’s make sure that we are healthy and we are taking care of our souls, healthy, let’s make sure that we are taking care of the planet, let’s make sure that we all being good to one another.
It doesn’t matter what religion, what color your skin is, it does not matter at the end of the day were all all human diet. And the kids be…
We are being something, and we have the ability to be on is so much greater and we once worked and if we can wrap our head around that, we’re gonna be in good shape. And the empathy, I will be that I think that’s a great perspective. So things to slow down for you, you’ve been given extra time as well.
Yeah, so what is just one good key takeaway for everybody for going forward? What is the one uplifting thing that you would say to everybody right now for this time?
As we kind of close out, I only think, really at the end. Everyone needs to understand the first time ever. You’re not alone, you are. We walked this planet.
A lot of people want this, but I think, and can tell you right now, the billions of us, on on this beautiful blue planet of ours for the first time, we’re all connected, not alone in any of this.
And so if you have this anxiety of alone, you’re not alone. We’re all together in this, and like I said to you earlier when we were talking, make sure you write down that one thing to make you. You just live and light up like a Christmas tree in just the leg that fire, and just write that down and say it out loud because that is the one thing that will help you get through this and everyone has something, so you don’t get a cop out and say, “I don’t got anything.
No, that’s not true, everyone’s got some… Yeah, I think you’re right. And then this might be the time to figure out what that something is, if you don’t know, I think there’s a… I quickly and quickly, I’ll share this.
And I think everyone, if this is the one thing people take away from this, this is suing for there are three things to make sure that you are, we’ll put in quotations. “Healthy” okay, so okay, sleep to exercise and eating now I’ll leave it up to people to decide what they’re gonna eat, and I’ll leave it up to… For people to decide what exercises is going to be.
But if you do those three things here at a do-it-You will manage and whether that’s going for a walk around the block, whether it’s actual physical exercise inside your home, eating properly or learning online, whatever it’s gonna be, it’s just make sure that you all getting that sleeping and if you do those three things, you’re gonna be like, by males today, I’m gonna be alright.
I’ve had a great time chatting with you if people wanna continue the conversation, do they message you reach out to you, maybe for future events, even a… You speak to their crowds.
What is the best way to get in contact with you?
So they can email me, I’ll give a direct email to my business.
So it’s J-Andrews, @ solution 4 U, that’s number 4, and that capital U dot com. What they can do is look me up on LinkedIn, I’m very active on LinkedIn.
They’re helping a lot of business professionals out there, giving inspirational and advice. So I’m quite active on there, so just reach out, find in that… And I don’t say no to anyone.
So if you need help, I’m here out my Y in this world is to positively affect one person every single day. So if I’ve done nine for any of you out there that I can go to bed and sleep very well tonight, knowing that I’ve done that.
Well, you’ve given me a boost of happiness today and positivity.
So just letting you know that that’s already happened. Alright, well, I eat thank you very much and we’ll close out.